MAKE YOUR BRAND THE brand eVERYONE'S lowkey stalking and OBSESSED WITH
THIS IS NOT A SAFE SPACE FOR boring BRANDs
(we all have that one person we stalk)
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Forget those basic and boring AF personal branding coaches... I'll give you the brand others wish they had.
You're sick of being a nobody. I get it.
You're scrolling past those epic brands while yours feels like a wet paper towel. Not the wet paper towel. We're not playing that game anymore! You want to be the freakin' star of the show, the brand that makes everyone want to go to a park to have a reflecting sesh. But those boring coaches with their played-out tactics are leaving you high and dry. Listen sister, I'm Jasmine, your brand hype woman, here to ditch the basic BS and build you a brand so electrifying it makes your competition look like a dead flashlight. Forget blending in, forget those disastrous DIY attempts. Let's craft a brand strategy that screams YOU, turning you from barely noticeable to absolutely unforgettable.
Howdy, fellow cringy Millennial!
"Forget Nasa, I'm here to launch your brand into the stratosphere."
sold out status brand strategy | fun brand strategy | bold brand strategy
Okay, those boring brand snobs? They're totally clueless about your awesome brand energy. You need someone who gets your quirky jokes, your world-domination plans, and your need for a brand that's extra AF. Like your fave Starbucks order (jk, I know it's Brown Sugar Shaken Espresso - mine too girly twirly pop). That's where I come in. Let's be real, for one second, though, I'm not just a brand strategist, I'm a total brand nerd when it comes to brand strategy. On my free time I read. What do I read? Branding books. I watch videos of branding. I'm always on top of things and trying out new things. That's music to my soul, trying new things. This keeps me on my toes when it comes to turning overlooked brands into freakin' magnets for dream clients. All that knowledge is for YOU. It's my secret weapon for turning overlooked brands into total badasses that make everyone else jealous. I spill all the tea, no gatekeeping here!
Forget stuffy experts, I'm the brand bestie you NEED to make your brand POP.
"I'm in that phase right now where it feels illegal to not block blue light after 7pm and not to go to bed before 10pm."
the name
I'm English second language and when I moved to the states, I took my brown stuffed animal moose with me, Mr. Moose. One night, I was deep into a conversation with husband about my deep love towards moose and reindeer. I was telling him how they are the superior animals. Period. Well, I was deep in my talks about moose and how superior they are (I told you) and I for the life of me, could not remember what antlers were called "you know the two things on the head, the anchors, you know" my husband laughed "the anchors???" "Yeah, the things, you know?!" and ever since that day, I kept calling them anchors. And moose anchors always stuck with me through times, maybe subconsciously I always knew it would need it later.
The most embarrassing time of my life. I think the worst part was that I thought I was the shit. When I started my "entrepreneurial" girly journey, I first started as someone who did random moose art pieces that I posted on IG - hoping to be found like half the waitstaff in LA. Ugh, makes me cringe when I think about it. I basically found a random fact and paired with it with a moose drawing that I did of the random fact. Later, I asked a business coach I admired if she had any tips what I could do differently to gain some traction and they said they don't help non businesses. And I said ouch, pain, I'm fallen and I can't get up. I stopped. And I re-evaluated.
I read a book, can you believe that?! Lol. I'm actually big reader, so SHAME ON YOU IF YOU SAID NO. It was about how to find your "what" in the biz world. After reading this book, I stumbled across branding. The more I looked into it the more perfect it seemed to be. I rebranded and became a brand designer. It was a vibe. I helped tons of businesses to rebrand themselves, made logos, colors, found the perfect fonts. But the more I learned about strategy, the more it got me excited. And the more I realized that brand visuals are nothing without a good strategy backing it up. Branding is brand strategy. Visuals are like the last piece to the puzzle. All the other pieces are brand strategy.
One thing about me, I love to design. Another thing about me, I follow my guts. My guts were (not inflamed, but def screaming) telling me to stop doing design. And I decide to follow that tip and ditched the brand design aspect of my business because I found it a bit draining at times. I rebranded myself for the 100th time and became the cringy millennial brand strategist, helping other cringy millennials to find their voice and become the person in their niche. Now we be trolling and lolling. Here's one thing I never do: make boring brands.
values
anti-basic
01
redemptive
02
light-hearted
03
our mission
"We're on a mission to show businesses how to turn their quirks into their biggest asset. We'll help you put the "you" back in your business, build a brand people actually want to hang out with, and have a heck of a lot of fun while growing like crazy."
"Think of me as the Lorelai Gilmore of branding. Fast talking, coffee obsessed, and here to help you build a brand that's as awesome as Luke's coffee."
Okay, I'm Jasmine - you new brand's new hype woman, nice to meet you!
I'm a total sucker for bulk candy bins, well crafted puns, my Kindle, I have a weakness for freshly baked sourdough, and anything pumpkin spice flavored (basic, I know, though I do prefer brown sugar shaken espresso, so rebel of me). Fueled by iced coffee and a healthy dose of sarcasm, I'm here to ditch the generic and make your brand the Cheeto dust of your industry.
I'm the friend who'll always tell you if your outfit is a slay or a fail (with love, of course), a proud dog mom to an oversized lapdog (who acts like he is really dumb but then does the most intelligent ish to rebel us), and a binge-watcher of cheesy reality TV (don't judge my 90 Day Fiancé obsession).
I'm the first and last brand strategist you will ever need, honey.
My dream car is a Jeep Wrangler (or maybe a Bronco or maybe a G Wagon...), and my evenings are best spent binging The Office with a bowl of bulk bin candy.
I'm convinced that if I wasn't a brand strategist, I would be a comedian or own a little small town bakery, or a coffee shop (I would totally be Luke). Today, I dream of exploring the world, living in the arctic circle by the snowy landscapes of Lapland, and helping YOU build a brand that's as bold and unforgettable as a well-timed pun.
Enough about me? Good! Let's talk about how I can set your brand on fire...
we're the jalapeno of brand strategists
Meet Jasmine, the Strategist Your Competition Doesn't Want You to Know.
You looking this good? It’s jail. Absolute jail. Next time I see you with your new bold disruptive brand, I’m going to put handcuffs on you and take you to jail. Firstname, you can't expect to stand out in your niche with a brand that's as timeless as a rock. Prepare for a bold brand strategy breakout. No more timeless, rock like branding for you. We're here to infuse your identity with wit, edge, and your unique essence. Ready to become the market shaking disruptor with a design so magnetic, auroras are jealous? Get set to be the brand that's not just seen but sought after. Escape the branding beige, it's time to make your brand illegally good.
2. Brand design that makes you look illegaly good
I'm all about websites, and you know what I love more than a good website? A website that converts like a dream. Say goodbye to websites that resemble an ugly Christmas sweater and hello to a legacy-driven digital experience. With our touch, your brand becomes so engaging, so disruptive, it’ll have the crowd—and yes, even grandma—coming back for more. Elevate your online presence with us, where every click feels like an exclusive invite to the coolest club in town. Ready to transform your site into the ultimate conversion engine?
3. Hot Girl Summer is Out, Hot Girl Website is In
FOOD
the office, parks & rec, gilmore girls
Christmas
holiday
favorite shows
autumn, but also winter, and spring, and summer
smell
vanilla, fresh forest, summer rain
Season
brown sugar oatmilk shaken espresso (duh)
My go to coffee order
Lorelai Gilmore
character
I really like asian food but also pizza
favorites
bag raiders
beautiful things
northern attitude
Noah Kahan
Benson boone
electric feel
Ari abdul
babydoll
mgmt
Guilty as sin?
taylor swift
a moment apart
odesza
shooting stars
now playing
family
or Ford Broco, or Mercedes G Wagon
I want to see the seven wonders of the world
travel
own a jeep
manage to keep them alive (it can't be that hard)
own a house
in Lappland, Finland
plants
need I say more? what dream life.
coffee business
I fu*king love space
go to space
start a family and ya know, that whole thing
things i want to do before im 80
What’s the most spontaneous thing you’ve ever done?
Dirty Paws by Of Monsters and Men
cringy millennial humor, my life
What’s something that always makes you laugh?
If you had a theme song, what would it be?
dogs, that'd be a heck of a convo
If you could talk to one species of animals, which one would it be?
moved abroad, moved back, got married, business
for funsies
Who's This Chick?
"I'd rather give up iced coffee than let you settle for a boring brand (and that's saying something)."
So, what's in it for YOU?
You're a total powerful entrepreneur and you've got big dreams for your business, but crafting a unique brand that screams "that's SO me!" feels.... kiiiiinda messy and impossible right now. Like trying to tame an otter. Impossible. I love otters.
(Been there, done that. I once spent a week agonizing over the perfect shade of "millennial green" for my brand. :) Hmhm.)
You KNOW your dream clients are out there, but attracting them right now feels like playing a game of tag with a tornado. It's wild, unpredictable, and probably going to leave you feeling dizzy. And those branding tasks on your to-do list, like nailing down your messaging and creating a killer brand story? They're starting to feel like that pair of jeans you'll never actually wear again.
Girlfriend, it's time to ditch the DIY nightmare. I'm your brand hype woman, armed with a strategic brain, a whole lotta rebellious energy, and an iced coffee addiction scarier than Monday mornings. Think bold tactics that turn heads, messaging that feels like it came straight from your soul, and a killer brand that screams YOU so loud your competition's ears will ring. Say goodbye to blending in – sold-out status, here you come!
There's like a bazillion branding "experts" out there, but how many actually get what makes YOU awesome? And like, what makes me worth your time and hard earned cash?
LET'S BE HONEST – YOUR BRAND DESERVES TO BE THE STAR, NOT SOME EXTRA IN THE BACKGROUND HOLDING A LATTE (No judgment, though, lattes are life).
"Jasmine helped me to integrate my values into my brand in a way that helps my ideal client understand what me and my business is all about! "
- Mckenzie
You're tired of watching your big dreams gather dust while you try to piece together a brand that gets noticed
Scrolling through Insta, those effortlessly cool brands make you wanna hurl your phone across the room (though that wouldn't be very zen of you). But turning your brilliance into a strategy that snags those dream clients? Feels like wrestling an octopus wearing tangled Christmas lights. What the actual heck? You need a branding bestie who gets your quirky humor, your bold ambitions, and your need for a brand that gives "I'm a weirdo and you love it." Screw generic templates and boring advice. I'm here to help you ditch the DIY disaster zone and unleash a brand so magnetic it makes your competition spontaneously combust with jealousy (not really, but close). Think bold strategy, soul-deep messaging, and a brand identity that makes you want to book a business class ticket to your dream location.
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MOOSE ANCHORS
Come find me on Instagram!
Ever feel like every brand strategist sounds the same? Spouting the same empty promises about "visibility" and "authenticity"? Yawn. If you're sick of being just another face in the crowd, ready for a brand that makes you stand out, leads to massive brand growth, and attracts your dream clients like a magnet, stick around. This ain't your mama's branding rodeo.
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