"I always wanted to be an astronaut but you know, this will do."
Sup? I'm Jasmine. I'm so special I get the SSSS stamp on my boarding passes.
The quadruple S! It's like the TSA thinks I'm a secret agent or something. Or maybe they just can't get enough of me and want to see me extra early at the airport. Either way, it's too bad it doesn't come with a free upgrade to first class.
Wanted: Black sheep of the niche.
I'm here to prove a point: you can have a wholesome brand that's funny and bold. You can even show up in your pajamas with a ketchup stain on them and a hot mess of a bun with baby hairs sticking out in all directions. Heck, you can even wear your bunny slippers if you're feeling extra fancy. And guess what? You can still make bank! So let's embrace our inner hot mess and show the world that you can be wholesome and badass at the same time.
Everything I know about business I've learned from Leslie Knope and Michael Scott. So, we're off to a good start here.
When I'm not grinding away at work, I'm probably streaming all my favorite old-school shows like Seinfeld, The Office, Gilmore Girls, or Golden Girls. So many shows, so little time! And speaking of Golden Girls, according to Buzzfeed's expert analysis, I'm the legendary Rose Nylund. Yeah, I'm basically a comedic genius with a heart of gold. Now if only I could figure out how to work "Thank you for being a friend" into my daily vocabulary.
WE MAKE BRANDS THAT ARE SO GOOD PEOPLE FORGET THEY EVER HAD A CHOICE
I HELP YOU TO CREATE A WHOLESOME BOLD BRAND THAT HAS OTHERS GASPING FOR AIR
"I'm in that phase right now where it feels illegal to not block blue light after 7pm and not to go to bed before 10pm."
Experience? Check.
your go to guru
Prepare your tissues, folks. It's time for my sob story. Ever since I was a kid, I loved art and drawing. That's it. That's the story. It's a sob story because here I am today, still doing it. No, let me tell you, I went to a school to become a customer service/marketing person. Graduated. I went to a school to become a game art designer. Switched to marketing in social media (about a year left in studies) and here I am. Still doing art. Well, wholesome brand strategy and design to be exact, but you get the point.
10+
brands brandified
1.4M
coffee cups drank. 1M of those were cold
9828
laughs had
Expertise? Double-check.
Moose anchors The answer to your branding prayers
Before Moose Anchors started dominating the branding game, we were all about teaching people random facts through our graphics. We were basically hoping to be discovered like half of the waitstaff in LA. But one day, I took a sip of my extra shot of espresso latte and it was like an awakening. Suddenly, I was thrust into a world of brand strategy and design, and I never looked back. Now, I spend my days creating bold brands and teaching people about wholesome brand strategy. And let me tell you, Moose Anchors isn't just a name, it's a legend. It came from me, a non-native English speaker, accidentally calling my stuffed moose's antlers "anchors." I mean, I forgot the actual name for years, but who cares? It's unique, it's memorable, and it's Moose Anchors.
A dash of moose, a pinch of spice, and a whole lot of surprise; That's what Moose Anchors is made of.
Elevate, Differentiate, Dominate
Our branding mantra:
If you wanna be a kickass, purpose-driven brand like us, you gotta know what the heck you stand for. That means figuring out what floats your boat and what makes you wanna puke, so you can get people to relate to your brand like a BFF. Here at Moose Anchors, we're all about making an impact, cracking jokes, spreading good vibes, and embracing the unexpected like a long-lost lover. We're all about helping you let loose, make people smile, and leave 'em feeling like they just hit the jackpot.
We were born with a silver value spork in our mouth. Who needs a fancy spoon when you have a utensil that can do it all?
Our vision is to take the "entrepreneurial space" and turn it into a big ol' bowl of happiness and wholesomeness. We're done with all the sketchy tactics to get people interested in your biz, like FOMO and those creepy sales funnels. Let's be real, the world has enough bad stuff going on already. And no one wants to do business with a company that's more shady than a palm tree. So, let's ditch the negativity and focus on spreading positivity and feel-good vibes. It all starts with your brand, baby!
If you don’t think anyone cares about your vision... eye care.
That was a joke. I'm a any-caf addict. Any type, any kind, I will take it. Our mission is to create brands that will knock your socks off, leaving your customers so overjoyed that they'll start doing cartwheels. We don't just make you look good, we make you look like the belle of the ball. We create brands that are so magnetic, you'll have to wear gloves just to keep from sticking to your computer screen. And with a bold character like ours, you'll be the talk of the town, the envy of your competitors, and the apple of your customers' eyes.
What is a vision without a mission? An empty promise. Like decaf coffee.
I know you're feeling invisible right now. Your competitors are stealing customers faster than Usain Bolt runs 100 meters. It's like trying to stand out in a pumpkin patch wearing an orange shirt. And don't even get me started on how your potential clients can't tell you apart from your rivals - you're all just "meh" to them. Fear not, my friend, for I shall transform you into the belle of the ball, the cream of the crop, the cheese on the pizza. Let me help you be the obvious choice in your niche, so you'll be as hot as a latte in the middle of winter.
1. You're going to be spooked out by how seen you will feel
It’s jail. Absolute jail. Next time I see you with your new wholesome brand, I’m going to put handcuffs on you and take you to jail. Firstname, you can't expect to stand out in your niche with a brand that's as timeless as a rock. Everyone and their grandmother's pet parrot has a timeless brand these days. It's time to ditch that old-fashioned thinking and inject your brand with some humor, attitude, and most importantly, you! Let's make your brand so magnetic that you could light up the northern lights all by yourself. Get ready to break out of the branding prison!
2. Brand design that makes you look illegaly good
I'm all about websites, and you know what I love more than a good website? A website that converts like a cult leader. Your competition won't know what hit them when your website becomes the ultimate conversion machine. We'll make your brand relatable AF, bold, and so wholesome that even your grandma will love it. Then, we'll take your website to the next level of relatable AF-ness. It's a simple recipe for success, and I'm about to sprinkle some magic on it.
3. Hot Girl Summer is Out, Hot Girl Website is In
libra sun and rising. cancer moon. enneagram 9. infp
my signs
the office, parks & rec, gilmore girls
taylor swift, of monsters & men, odesza
my jams
favorite shows
autumn, but also winter, and spring, and summer
hobbies
being in the nature, reading, hiking
Season of choice
brown sugar oatmilk shaken espresso
My go to coffee order
confused (90% of the time)
current mood
Here is the tea about me: I have a PhD in binge-watching and a black belt in procrastination.
There is a rumor going around that wholesome brands have more fun.
Ok, listen, I know you're not a criminal, but if you think you can skip out on branding your business, you’re going straight to jail. I'll even come to your trial and bring some popcorn to watch you get sentenced to branding purgatory. But I know you're smarter than that, and you're here because you want a killer brand that'll make your competition cry like a baby. You're here to get the bold, badass brand of your wildest dreams because you're sick of wasting time trying to figure it all out.
TIMELESS DESIGN MAY NEVER GET OLD, BUT IT ALSO NEVER GETS NOTICED
No more late-night staring contests with your computer screen, hoping that some magic branding fairy will appear with the perfect design. Nope, we're talking about a real strategy here, something so good it'll make your pizza taste like victory. And let me tell you, I've been in those shoes before, and it's not a fun place to be. That's why I'm here to help you create the brand of your dreams. Or, if you prefer, I can recommend some organic bug spray that's as effective as a feather duster. Your call!
And it's true.
"I remember when 'swiping right' meant turning the page of a book, not finding a date."
"You're going to get so much more out of this experience than just a beautiful, cohesive brand. The clarity and brand strategy that you develop along the way is PRICELESS! This is the exact thing you need to take your business to the next level."
Mckenzie
"Jasmine helped me to integrate my values into my brand in a way that helps my ideal client understand what me and my business is all about!"
If you're still unsure about us, I guess I'll just have to bribe you with more resources.
You can keep playing hard to get, but your brand has already swiped right on us.
But let's be real, we both know your brand is dying for us.
What is your gut saying? Yes? Probably yes. Mine is saying, "Did you really eat that entire pizza by yourself?"
So, you're here because you want to make a real splash with your brand, huh? Well, let me tell you, we're not here to play small. We're talking bold, loud, and in-your-face branding that'll make your competitors cry. And let's not forget about the warm and fuzzy feeling you'll get when your clients are praising your wholesome brand. Oh, and don't worry about making a decision, there's a button waiting for you below that'll magically solve all your branding problems with just one click. Easy peasy, lemon squeezy!
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We'll whip your brand into shape with our bold, witty, and hilarious brand strategy, so you can spread the wholesome vibes and make your people feel good!
brand strategy and design
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